Friday, September 18, 2015

Life After Zombies

The other day, I was sitting in my house eating a Colby jack cheese stick and enjoying it immensely. It got me to thinking about zombies (because, really, that’s a natural progression of thoughts for me), and I wondered if the cheese stick would still exist after the dead rose and destroyed the world. I figured it wouldn’t, and that made me sad.

That made me realize that there probably wouldn’t be any dairy after the zompocalypse. I love dairy. I have a glass of milk with dinner practically every night and on my cereal in the morning. I’m a huge fan of cheese, and I like butter. What would I do if these things didn’t exist anymore? How awful would that be?

I’m sure that someone somewhere in the world would still possess the knowledge and skill to create these delectable foods, but they wouldn’t be readily available, and that would be a tragedy.

That got me to thinking about other things I would miss after the end of the world, and high on my list was a hot shower. Now, I know I’m not the only one who would miss this. In season 1 of The Walking Dead, when Rick, Morgan, and Morgan’s son get to the sheriff’s department, the first thing they do is take a hot shower.

And who can blame them? Our desire for cleanliness sets us apart from the filthy, rotting undead that are trying to kill us and eat us. It gives us a sense of normalcy and a routine for the day. It makes us feel human.

The purpose of zombie films and shows is to blur the lines between humans and zombies and show how we aren’t much different than one another. We’re both willing to devolve to our basest desires and attack and kill each other to get what we want. The only difference between the humans and zombies is that the zombies’ motives are known—they just want to eat us—but the humans are conniving and sly and should be watched carefully.

Interestingly, the opportunity for the humans in these films and TV shows to take showers is few and far between. Once the characters become dirty and sweaty and unclean, they become even more like the zombies. Think about it.

Dairy and hot showers, two of the things I would miss the most after the apocalypse. What are some of the things you’d miss after the undead rise?


  1. Chocolate. Pet food. Dog barking being ok (as it would draw unwanted attention.) "Normal" life. Craft time. Being clean would be a top one. Deodorant. ;)

  2. You don't need a whole lot of knowledge to produce dairy products. Sure, there's some, but low-tech societies have been doing it for a long, long time. What you probably WON'T have is dairy cattle. Cattle require x amount of space per animal and y amount of feed. While, sure, there's a lot of grass and such to graze them on, having enough secured space to keep them would be problematic. Unless a particular zpoc has the infected ignoring everything but humans, I think our vast herds of domesticated livestock would be eaten away.

    As far as cleanliness, I would agree that contemporary people, particularly from developed economies, would agree with you. On the other hand, humans are supremely adaptable and for a long, long time, cleanliness (as we think of it) wasn't that big of a priority :) You have to reach a certain level of affluence before those kinds of things become important social signals.

    Still...I loves me some dairy and I don't like to stink. Best to build a huge wall around some cows and keep the showers hot :)

    In other terms, things we would forecasting would probably be right up there. In the aftermath of a zpoc, when things are being put back together, farming would become important. Not having access to realtime weather updates would be a problem, I would think. Could be we're in a time where those farmers that were able to do well without satellite aid are few and far between, leaving us with a couple generations of laptop farmers.

    1. Absolutely great points! And so very true. Thankfully, we humans are an adaptable lot, and we would figure it out. I'm sure we would even figure out how to farm without accurate weather forecasting. We've done it before. We've been really spoiled with our technological advances, so doing without them would be difficult, but we'd manage.