Thursday, August 1, 2013

Interview with Neeta Lyffe, Zombie Exterminator

Neeta Lyffe (Actually, Karina's sister, Regina Koske, modeling.  Thanks, sis!  You kick zombie butt!)

Hi Neeta. Thanks for being with us today. I was concerned that your duties might keep you from speaking with us.

It's no big deal, really.  You know, I'm just an exterminator.  I spray for ants, set rat traps…  Zombie extermination is just one of the things I do--and, thank heaven, there aren't *that* many zombies out there.  I have free time, even when I was hosting Zombie Death Extreme, I managed to find time to relax and have fun. 

I just caught the cover for your book on Karina’s website. Sure looks like you can kick some butt.

(Blushes) I hate that picture.  There is no way I'd take on a zombie with my uniform half off, and trust me, if a zombie is down, his head is away from his neck.  But people do like it, and I can kick butt, though most of the time, I'd rather slice off the head.

Recently heard that you got yourself into a spot of trouble—something to do with a zombie and a lawyer. What is up with that?

It's been in the news enough, but long story short:  Lawyer decides to entertain guests with a  backyard shindig, featuring all manner of strongly smelling foods, including (who knows why) pickled beets and something smothered in blue cheese dressing.  Said lawyer lives behind a cemetery.  When the undead started rising and following the smells, he doesn’t panic but depends on his electric fence to keep them out.  Like a little zap is going to stop something already dead.  By the time I responded to the 9-1-1, there was pandemonium everywhere--and one guy videoing on his phone.  Me against nine undead?  Even I'm not good enough to get in close.  I used the flamethrower until I ran out of fuel.  One flaming meat staggered onto the porch, probably in response to the video guy.  Some zombies still have an instinct for trying to get on YouTube.  Anyway, a brilliant guest tossed vodka on it, which set the porch on fire.  I was busy trying to unstick my chainsaw from one zombie's shoulder at the time.

I re-killed all the zombies before backup got there.  Saved over a dozen lives.  But Lawyer Larry sued me for wrecking his backyard. (shrug)  Mom always said not to expect any appreciation for this job.

I’m not a fan of reality TV. I thought by the time 2040 came to pass it would have run its course. I hear it’s helping you out, though. What made you want to get into TV anyway?

I wanted to educate people about zombie extermination and defense.  Despite everything, I think we accomplished that, though not as well as I'd like.  I hope everyone will catch *The Zombie Syndrome* on the Modern History Channel when it comes out.  And, frankly, there was no way I was going to pay off that lawsuit on an exterminator's pay.  It was a choice of doing reality TV or losing my house.

So, I hear the paparazzi are driving you a bit nuts. How are you keeping them in line?

Have I shown you my chain saw?

**Excerpted from an interview with Neeta on The Book Connection.

Here’s an important question: where can readers pick up a copy of Neeta Lyffe, Zombie Exterminator?

Do you have an online home too? is where you can learn more about the book.  Naturally, the show has its own website:  You can follow the link to my extermination homepage; if you live in Southern California, Inglewood area, look me up.  I take care of pests from Ants to Zombies.

Thanks for making time for us today, Neeta. Any parting words?

Just remember:  I'm a professional zombie exterminator with training and a license to re-kill.  If you ever see a zombie, your best bet is to call 9-1-1, douse yourself in cleaning products and run.  Don't be a hero.

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